Wednesday, March 26, 2008

It's been too long ...

It's been a long time since I wrote anything ... at least here ... I guess things have just been progressing. Everything moving along at it's own pace, some things fast and some slow.

I guess 2008 has it's own rhythm that I haven't quite figured out yet, and while that troubles some people ... for me it's a blessing as it keeps everything new and comfortable all at once. There is still so much left to do this year, and it feels as though there just might be enough time to do it ... for once I don't feel rushed or stalled. Everything can be dealt with in it's own time, and the pressure to be ... something or somewhere ... melts into the corner where no one cares.

Nobody 'cept You

There's nothing 'round here I believe in
'Cept you, yeah you
And there's nothing to me that's sacred
'Cept you, yeah you

You're the one that reaches me
You're the one that I admire
Every time we meet together
My soul feels like it's on fire
Nothing matters to me
And there's nothing I desire
'Cept you, yeah you

Nothing 'round here I care to try for
'Cept you, yeah you
Got nothing left to live or die for
'Cept you, yeah you

There's a hymn I used to hear
In the churches all the time
Make me feel so good inside
So peaceful, so sublime
And there's nothing to remind me of that
Old familiar chime
'Cept you, uh huh you

Used to play in the cemetery
Dance and sing and run when I was a child
Never seemed strange
But now I just pass mournfully by
That place where the bones of life are piled
I know somethin' has changed
I'm a stranger here and no one sees me
'Cept you, yeah you

Nothing much matters or seems to please me
'Cept you, yeah you
Nothing hypnotizes me
Or holds me in a spell
Everything runs by me
Just like water from a well
Everybody wants my attention
Ev'rybody's got something to sell
'Cept you, yeah you


- Bob Dylan

Monday, February 18, 2008

I sent my ...

I sent my soul into the invisible,

Some letter of that after life to spell.

And by and by my soul returned to me

And answered, I myself am heaven and hell.


- Omar Khayyam (Rubaiyat)

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Contrasts of ...

I just came back from a long hard talk with a friend who is in a tough spot at the moment. It was one of those conversations that you just need from time to time ... especially at this time. It centered on the hardships of life, but more importantly it was about love ... love lost ... love found, and the dynamics of it as it passes through relationships.

Those euphoric feelings of bliss contrasted against the painful daggers of hurt and despair. How one should be lucky about finding something so true, and for however long or brief it may be ... at least you've found it. Then ... the torment that accompanies the end of it all ... how it tears at you, and leaves you wondering whether or not it was worth the pain.

In the end ... things unfold as they should, which is something I truly believe. All things good and bad come into and out of your life as they should, and at the exact moment that they should. Things happen for reasons ... people who you never expect to see again magically reappear and people you thought would never leave vanish ...

The point of all this ... is that after experiencing something so great ... the only reason you wouldn't want that again is fear ... fear of losing it, and being lost all over again ...

Tell Me

Tell me, I've got to know.
Tell me, tell me before I go.
Does that flame still burn? Does that fire still glow?
Or has it died out and melted like the snow.
Tell me.
Tell me.

Tell me, what are you focused upon?
Tell me willit come to me after you're gone.
Tell me now with a glance or a sigh
Shall I hold you close?
Or Shall I let you go by?
Tell me.
Tell me.

Is that the heat and the beat of your pulse that I feel?
If it's not that, what is it your're trying to conceal?
Do you have any secrets,? they will only come out in time.
Do you lie in your bed and stare at the stars?
Is your main friend an old acquaintance of ours?
Tell me.
Tell me.

Tell me, Are those rock and roll dreams in your eyes?
Tell me, behind what door your treasure lies.
Ever gone broke in a big way?
Ever done the opposite of what the experts say?
Tell me.
Tell me.

Is this some kind of game that you're playin' with my heart?
How deep must I go, Where do I start?
Do you have any morals?
Do you have any point of view?
Is that a smile I see on your face?
Will it lead me to glory or lead me to disgrace?
Tell me.
Tell me.

Tell me, is that my name in your book?
Tell me, should I come back and take another look?
Tell me the truth, don't you tell me no lies.
Are you anyone some one prays for or cries?
Tell me.
Tell me.


Tell me, I've got to know.
Tell me, tell me before I go.
Does that flame still burn? Does that fire still glow?
Or has it died out and melted like the snow.
Tell me.
Tell me.

Tell me, what are you focused upon?
Tell me willit come to me after you're gone.
Tell me now with a glance or a sigh
Shall I hold you close?
Or Shall I let you go by?
Tell me.
Tell me.

Is that the heat and the beat of your pulse that I feel?
If it's not that, what is it your're trying to conceal?
Do you have any secrets,? they will only come out in time.
Do you lie in your bed and stare at the stars?
Is your main friend an old acquaintance of ours?
Tell me.
Tell me.

Tell me, Are those rock and roll dreams in your eyes?
Tell me, behind what door your treasure lies.
Ever gone broke in a big way?
Ever done the opposite of what the experts say?
Tell me.
Tell me.

Is this some kind of game that you're playin' with my heart?
How deep must I go, Where do I start?
Do you have any morals?
Do you have any point of view?
Is that a smile I see on your face?
Will it lead me to glory or lead me to disgrace?
Tell me.
Tell me.

Tell me, is that my name in your book?
Tell me, should I come back and take another look?
Tell me the truth, don't you tell me no lies.
Are you anyone some one prays for or cries?
Tell me.
Tell me.

-Bob Dylan

vs.

Nothing Even Matters

Now the skies could fall
Not even if my boss should call
The world it seems so very small
'Cause nothing even matters at all

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters at all
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters at all

See I don't need no alcohol
Your love makes me feel ten feet tall
Without it I'd go through withdrawal
'Cause nothing even matters at all

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters at all
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters at all

These buildings could drift out to sea
Some natural catastrophe
Still there's no place I'd rather be
'Cause nothing even matters to me

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters to me
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters to me

You're part of my identity
I sometimes have the tendency
To look at you religiously
'Cause nothing even matters to me

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters to me
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters to me

Now you won't find me at no store
I have no time for manicures
With you it's never either or
'Cause nothing even matters no more

Nothing even matters
Nothing it don't matter
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters no more

Now my team could score
And make it to the Final Four
Just repossess my 4x4
'Cause nothing even matters no more

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters no more
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters no more

To me( till fade out)

-Lauryn Hill

As a side note ... these two songs came on in succession as I was thinking about all of ... this .......

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Whole Wide World

Another song ... another favorite, mainly because it's so ... happy.

Originally written by the Monkees and covered countless times, but the version I prefer is by Wreckless Eric, and was used in Stranger Than Fiction - one of my favorite movies of all time.

Whole Wide World

When I was a young boy
My mama said to me
There's only one girl in the world for you
And she probably lives in Tahiti

I'd go the whole wide world
I'd go the whole wide world
Just to find her

Or maybe she's in the Bahamas
Where the Carribean sea is blue
Weeping in a tropical moonlit night
Because nobody's told her 'bout you

I'd go the whole wide world
I'd go the whole wide world
Just to find her
I'd go the whole wide world
I'd go the whole wide world
Find out where they hide her

Why am I hanging around in the rain out here
Trying to pick up a girl
Why are my eyes filling up with these lonely tears
When there're girls all over the world

Is she lying on a tropical beach somewhere
Underneath the tropical sun
Pining away in a heatwave there
Hoping that I won't be long

I should be lying on that sun-soaked beach with her
Caressing her warm brown skin
And then in a year or maybe not quite
We'll be sharing the same next of kin

I'd go the whole wide world
I'd go the whole wide world
Just to find her
I'd go the whole wide world
I'd go the whole wide world
Find out where they hide her

Thursday, January 03, 2008

It's 2008 ... bring on the pink elephants and dancing pigs!!!

A year older a year wiser ....

It's such a cliche, but in many aspects I can see where it comes from.

As I sit here thinking over the past few weeks I come to a strange but comforting appreciation of where I am, where I've been and what I've come to. Time spent with friends and family especially during times when it's so important to do so, makes you really realize what you have ... or in my case how MUCH I actually have. You forget about the someone you don't have, the things you want, and the places you haven't been ... and you appreciate everything that you do ... for better and worse, you appreciate where you have come to physically, mentally and emotionally.

Maybe it's the dawning of the new year ... maybe it's much needed time away ... or maybe it's just growing up in more than a physical sense ... either way it's 2008 and the word "possibility" makes me happy.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Wonder

I wonder ... I'm wondering ...

It's all just thoughts, with no real singular idea(s)/direction ... Nothing clear or concise ...

... it's all just wonders.

In the meantime here's another song ...

Society

It's a mystery to me
we have a greed
with which we have agreed

You think you have to want
more than you need
until you have it all you won't be free

society, you're a crazy breed
I hope you're not lonely without me

When you want more than you have
you think you need
and when you think more than you want
your thoughts begin to bleed
I think I need to find a bigger place
'cos when you have more than you think
you need more space

society, you're a crazy breed
I hope you're not lonely without me
society, crazy and deep
I hope you're not lonely without me

there's those thinking more or less less is more
but if less is more how you're keeping score?
Means for every point you make
your level drops
kinda like its starting from the top
you can't do that...

society, you're a crazy breed
I hope you're not lonely without me
society, crazy and deep
I hope you're not lonely without me

society, have mercy on me
I hope you're not angry if I disagree
society, crazy and deep
I hope you're not lonely without me

-Eddie Vedder

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Thursday, September 06, 2007

Road to Peace

This is a really great song by Tom Waits ... kind of a bluesy, folksy song but really good, and what makes it great are the lyrics.

Sorry for getting all serious and political ... but it tells a simple story of Israel vs. Palestine ...

"Road to Peace"

Young Abdel Mahdi (Shahmay) was only 18 years old,
He was the youngest of nine children, never spent a night away from home.
And his mother held his photograph, opening the New York Times
To see the killing has intensified along the road to peace

There was a tall, thin boy with a whispy moustache disguised as an orthodox Jew
On a crowded bus in Jerusalem, some had survived World War Two
And the thunderous explosion blew out windows 200 yards away
With more retribution and seventeen dead along the road to peace

Now at King George Ave and Jaffa Road passengers boarded bus 14a
In the aisle next to the driver Abdel Mahdi (Shahmay)
And the last thing that he said on earth is "God is great and God is good"
And he blew them all to kingdom come upon the road to peace

Now in response to this another kiss of death was visited upon
Yasser Taha, Israel says is an Hamas senior militant
And Israel sent four choppers in, flames engulfed, tears wide open
And it killed his wife and his three year old child leaving only blackened skeletons

It's found his toddlers bottle and a pair of small shoes and they waved them in front of the cameras
But Israel says they did not know that his wife and child were in the car
There are roadblocks everywhere and only suffering on TV
Neither side will ever give up their smallest right along the road to peace

Israel launched it's latest campaign against Hamas on Tuesday
Two days later Hamas shot back and killed five Israeli soldiers
So thousands dead and wounded on both sides most of them middle eastern civilians
They fill the children full of hate to fight an old man's war and die upon the road to peace

"And this is our land we will fight with all our force" say the Palastinians and the Jews
Each side will cut off the hand of anyone who tries to stop the resistance
If the right eye offends thee then you must pluck it out
And Mahmoud Abbas said Sharon had been lost out along the road to peace

Once Kissinger said "we have no friends, America only has interests"
Now our president wants to be seen as a hero and he's hungry for re-election
But Bush is reluctant to risk his future in the fear of his political failures
So he plays chess at his desk and poses for the press 10,000 miles from the road to peace

In the video that they found at the home of Abdel Mahdi (Shahmay)
He held a Kalashnikov rifle and he spoke with a voice like a boy
He was an excellent student, he studied so hard, it was as if he had a future
He told his mother that he had a test that day out along the road to peace

The fundamentalist killing on both sides is standing in the path of peace
But tell me why are we arming the Israeli army with guns and tanks and bullets?
And if God is great and God is good why can't he change the hearts of men?
Well maybe God himself is lost and needs help
Maybe God himself he needs all of our help
Maybe God himself is lost and needs help
He's out upon the road to peace

Well maybe God himself is lost and needs help
Maybe God himself he needs all of our help
And he's lost upon the road to peace
And he's lost upon the road to peace
Out upon the road to peace.

- Tom Waits

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Something Reminded Me

Over the past few months things have happened that just made me think about ... everything.

I've watched family and friends ... join their lives forever ... meet ... greet ... stop ... hurt ... back and forth.

Everywhere people were entering or exiting ... some of it happy and some of it hard.

So what's the point? I don't know somewhere along the way I was reminded of something someone once read to me, and for the longest time I couldn't remember.

Then suddenly for whatever reason (although I don't believe in chance) ... I just remembered ... all of it ... It's a poem by Leonard Cohen and it reminds me of something from long ago that still makes me smile ... life is funny ...

As the mist leaves no scar
On the dark green hill
So my body leaves no scar
On you and never will
Through windows in the dark
The children come, the children go
Like arrows with no targets
Like shackles made of snow

True love leaves no traces
If you and I are one
It's lost in our embraces
Like stars against the sun

As a falling leaf may rest
A moment on the air
So your head upon my breast
So my hand upon your hair

And many nights endure
Without a moon or star
So we will endure
When one is gone and far

True love leaves no traces
If you and I are one
It's lost in our embraces
Like stars against the sun

- Leonard Cohen

Thursday, August 16, 2007

rambling on

So ... it's been over a month since the last time I entered anything ... and in all honesty there's not much I care to write.

I guess since I have some spare time until the minutes tick by to signal the end of the day, I decided now would be a good time for adding an entry ... or entering an ad?

Much has happened in the span of a month ... do you remember when you were a little kid and a month felt like a year as you anxiously waited for something in the not so distant future ... and now that year feels like a week ... in some cases a day as everything zips by at such a hurried pace.

All at once things you look forward to come and go, and in the meantime the minutes in between become the stage for all sorts of interesting events, occassions, etc. until before you know it ... the month is over. The things that were supposed to be done are done. The events that were supposed to be happenings are now just memories ... fond ones, but memories none the less ...

As I sit here reliving the past month in my mind ... I'm already mentally calculating, examining and planning the next series of events, happenings, etc.

... and so the race comes around to the end, which is the start ... and we all just keep rambling on.

"have you ever ... have you ever ... had some ..."